Presbyterians and Ordination of Gays and Lesbians

This month, July 2011, the Presbyterian Church PC(USA) took another step in its 30 year debate on gay ordination. (The Presbyterian church is America’s incarnation of the Church of Scotland, with Calvinist theology and low-church order of worship.) The denomination reversed its earlier decision, and will permit regional bodies and local churches to choose if they want to ordain gays and lesbians. PC(USA), the largest Presbyterian body in the country, formed in 1980, when the northern and southern churches joined. They separated during the Civil War. The southern church was perceived to be more conservative than the northern body, and gays were sacrificed on the altar of expediency. Prior to 1980, individual churches chose to ordain whoever they wanted. After the merger, gays were excluded from ordination. This month’s decision simply reverts to the earlier position.

My father was a Presbyterian minister; like my mother, he had a Jewish parent. He was a gentle, loving man; when I was young, I thought I’d follow in his footsteps. After my undergraduate degree, I applied to a Presbyterian seminary. Because I am half-Jewish, I had no genetic link to the denomination; my family isn’t Scottish. I was raised in a traditional home, which wasn’t necessarily conservative, and certainly wasn’t doctrinaire. I never believed that one religion was any better than another. I liked the Presbyterian church, because during my childhood, it was a fairly progressive body. The northern denomination to which I belonged channeled a small sum of money for Angela Davis’s defense fund.

I wasn’t accepted into seminary. I believe one of my references “outed” me. At the time, I was sad and angry. It seemed unfair. I’m not unique in this experience: dozens of worthy people have been denied entrance to seminary or denied ordination because of the denomination’s policy.

From my middle-aged perspective, I am grateful that I was not accepted. I left the denomination; and, while I was often in a spiritual wilderness, I was also free. I was liberated from organized religion, and able to explore alternative spirituality. I was able to study my Jewish heritage, and read about Eastern religion. If I’d gone to seminary, I would have become a different man. There’s a stanza of an old hymn that says “trials that seemed the most distressing, in the end have proved a blessing.” I give my personal thanks to the church that wouldn’t have me. It set me free.

Being outside the church, I was given the opportunity to grow in a way I never could have inside organized religion. I learned more outside the church than I could have inside. Being an outsider, for whatever reason, isn’t bad. Edward Said wrote: “Even if one is not an actual … expatriate, it is still possible to think as one, to imagine and investigate in spite of barriers, and always to move away from the centralizing authorities towards the margins, where you see things that are usually lost on minds that have never traveled beyond the conventional and comfortable.”

I don’t know what the future will hold for anyone, much less the Presbyterian Church. This new-found tolerance could be reversed by the steady stream of disaffected Baptists entering the denomination. Discrimination has hurt many people; the church has wasted 30 years debating a silly policy, and has neglected larger issues: economic injustice, healthcare, hunger. During that time, the denomination, like most, has steadily declined in membership. The Presbyterians are too liberal for the hardliners, and not liberal enough for the progressives. Decisions about gay ordination haven’t changed this fundamental tension.

I respect anyone’s choice to join a church or to leave one. I am sorry for the hurt that has been caused on both sides of this debate. As a gay man, it is difficult not to personalize homophobic attacks. People who want gays out of the church are ignorant, and, sadly, in some cases willfully so. Using the Bible to justify prejudice is problematic; check out Godhatesshrimp.com for proof. As in the case for gay marriage, gay ordination should be possible for anyone who wants it.

For me personally, I had to leave the church to find God. I’m grateful for the Presbyterians’ discrimination. My view of God is far less parochial than it would have been otherwise. Someone said “they drew a box that kept me out, but love drew a circle that took them in.” I couldn’t say it better.

Presbyterians and Palestinians

I’m not an especially religious man, but there have been times in my life when religion has been a comfort. Social pressures, friends, and a spiritual quest are reasons to attend services, as is family. My father was a Presbyterian minister, and half of my family is Presbyterian. My family is of Jewish descent, but few practiced that religion. Immigration patterns were one reason for this. By 1900, there was so much anti-Semitism in New York that Jews were forced to immigrate through Galveston. The Galveston Movement, as the phenomenon is called, tried to assimilate Jews by sending them to Texas. My ancestors made their way north from Texas to St. Louis, dropping their Judaism somewhere along the way. But while religious practices were neglected, some principles remained. Assimilationist Jews have a strong emphasis on education and ethics, for instance.

My great-great grandmother, living in Poland, found herself in danger from constant war. In the 19th century, Prussia (Germany) was on the move, annexing that poor country. Her family were bakers, and she spent considering time hiding in the huge ovens to escape the clutches of marauding soldiers. She was desperate to flee, and because there were quotas on Jewish immigration by 1880, she forged some Christian documents. Maybe it wasn’t admirable to deny her heritage, but she got away from the fighting.

In the past, my Jewish forebears found the Presbyterian church to be a safe place. Historically, Presbyterians placed emphasis on literacy, education, and ethics. It was a Protestant church that wasn’t too dogmatic. That has changed. In 1980, the northern Presbyterian church and the southern Presbyterian church merged. They had separated during the Civil War; the southern church had the reputation, deserved or not, of being conservative.

The first casualty of this merger was gays. In 1980, Presbyterians stopped ordaining gays and lesbians. Since that time, the Presbyterian church has waged continual war on gays. Currently, a retired Presbyterian minister is on trial by the church for marrying gay couples when it was legal in California. The whole idea of a church trial sounds medieval.

Liberal Presbyterians have found a group they can fight: Israeli Jews. In 2004, the General Assembly came close to recommending divestment from Israel, joining the B-D-S movement (Boycott, Divest, Sanctions). Last week, the church I have sometimes attended held a meeting on divestment. I understand that Palestinians have been horribly treated. A recent U.N. report concludes that Israelis have committed war crimes--- but so have Palestinians. There is enough blame for both sides in the Middle East conflict. This meeting was a gateway for anti-Semites to express their anti-Jewish views.

Being of Jewish descent and going to a church is a tight rope, a balancing act. Last year, I attended a large Methodist church in town where the pastor gave a strange anecdote about helping Jews. The Christian church has a guilty history of anti-Semitism, and it is still there.

Maybe I was a fool to think I could have anything to do with church. As a gay man who is half-Jewish, I feel most comfortable at Reform Jewish services or the Unitarian church. Sometimes I feel a little like Cher singing “Half-breed.” At times of economic distress, demagogues use race and religion to divide. You only have to consider the “show me your papers” law in Arizona, and the Islamophobia we are experiencing. But being on the outside, and being different can be a gift. Edward Said said it best: “Even if one is not an actual immigrant or expatriate, it is still possible to think as one, to imagine, and investigate in spite of barriers, and always to move away from the centralizing authorities towards the margins, where you see things that are usually lost on minds that have never travelled beyond the conventional and comfortable.”